Unafraid Two

I am not afraid
To step through
Into the blazing light,
To leave a life of shadows
That taught me to fear day.

But this darkness I called home
Will not fade so easily.
It’ll try to clutch me as its prize,
And stay behind waiting
While I manage to flee.

And sometimes I’ll want to stay
And I’ll seek out the shadows once more,
My home that for so long,
Made up what was me.

But I will kiss its black mouth,
Smooth my hand down its sleek skin,
One last time,
And turn to join night’s sworn enemy.

Continue reading

Advertisement

Away

We came here together
To see what we could see,
To see if the seas would be different
Amongst other people’s eyes.

Light all around –
Above,
Below –
And the unmeasured water is all that you can see.

Light all around –
Above,
Below –
And I think that I may be safe at sea.

Enlightened,
Crazy,
I draw nearer to the edge,
And join your gazing, downward face.

A moment.
A waiting.
A shift.
I feel others come close.

The light bounces off the waves
And hits you in the eye.
You stagger and fall backwards
Into the waiting crowd.

Continue reading

As Clouds Drift By

“I like the sun,” she said, “but sometimes it hurts my eyes.” She put a hand up to shield the top of her face as she kept looking at the sky.

I looked over at her small form. Her long, black hair spread out around her head forming a dark halo that contrasted with the grass. She was wearing a neon-green top with large, hot pink stars on it that matched the hot pink of her shorts. Her fingers and toes glittered with sparkly nail polish that mirrored the sparkly studs in her ears. I smiled. At this age, she still liked everything bright.

I followed her example and put my hand up to my face and looked up. Around the sun, the clouds were wispy streaks of white against a deep-blue sky.

Continue reading

A Thank You

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, and I — like hopefully all of you — have a lot to be thankful for: There are people in my life who really love me and whom I love. My body is healthy. I have an income. I have no real unmet need of any kind. I have the possibility of tomorrow, and, unlike other times in my life, I’m actually excited about that possibility.

In addition to all these things, this year I am also thankful for this, this blog and what it represents.  When I started ToHearLife.com back in June, I had two main goals: to make writing an integral part of my life, and to get over my fear of other people reading what I write. These were for the purpose of the greater goal, which is to one day be a full-time writer. While I’m still millions of words and countless submissions away from that goal, I’m grateful that I have achieved the first two goals of making writing an essential part of my life and being, not only unafraid, but desirous of people reading what I write (cut to me checking my blog stats every night before bed).

But beyond helping me meet my current writing goals, this blog has also been helpful in ways I hadn’t foreseen. It’s pushed me forward, not only in my literary aspirations, but also in the mental, emotional, spiritual, and even social aspects of my life.

Continue reading

Crank the Night

She revved the engine and looked out into the night. The tangle of neon-lit streets spreading out before her seemed to gather at the end of her vision into one single, brilliant point. Finally, she thought, I’ll make it there.

All her life inside the city walls she had been waiting for her keys, for her car, for the ruler who people said was in charge to say, “Go!” But he had never said that word to her; he had never spoken to her at all. So she had decided to find a way out herself, going throughout the confines of the kingdom to barter for a car, to forge its keys, to take one step closer to the outer perimeter, and then another, to see how far she could go before the ruler interfered. She had gotten everything she needed, and he had never tried to stop her. She took that to mean he did not mind much if she left.

Continue reading

On a Ledge

He stood nervously on the ledge, his hands flung back to grip the steel railing. It was winter, and he could feel the skin on his fingers stick to the metal. But the cold didn’t matter. He had finally gathered the courage to come out here to the very edge, and all that was left was to take the final step forward. He looked down to the street below. There was no one there. It was just him and the silver light of the stars.

He inched forward so that only the soles of his bare feet remained on the cement. He leaned forward and felt his chest expand at the stretch. He squeezed his hands tighter around the railing. He closed his eyes and breathed in deeply, wanting to feel the cold air flow through his body and into his lungs as slowly as possible. He wanted to feel everything, for once in his life.

One more breath, he thought. One more breath, and then one last step. One more breath, and then…

“Patrick,” a woman’s voice said.

Continue reading

A Sad Case

http://art-dali.com
 “Rock ‘n Roll” Salvador Dali, 1957 (http://art-dali.com

Stretch out my arms
To meet your gaze
Bring our distance close
To find our meeting end.

I reach for your face
As you reach for my throat
There’s no greater sound
Than my words left unsaid.

Our twisting bodies twist,
Together,
And away.
Find our meaning in the way
You never let me see your face.

Together,
Then away,
Through the “nowhere else to be”,
Familiarity beats out courage
In a wasted land of space.
We’re stuck in this same town,
Same music,
Drinking the same drink,
Filling the same cemeteries,
At the end of our days.

Do not let me go,
Or I will fall away.

I fall away
At your gaze,
At your voice,
At your skin touching mine.
I fall away at every word you’ve ever said.

Stretch out my arms to chain you by my side.
You wanted to leave — I let you —
But now you’re here for my name
You choke out in endless echoes.

Together,
Then away,
Through the “time has ceased to be”.
I return to our courage-less bars,
Our courage-less songs,
Our frequented cemeteries.
Bury me beneath your ground.

I fall away
At your name,
At your face,
At your eyes slicing mine.
I fall away at every word you’ve ever said.

Stretch out my arms
To morph your body into mine.
Forever I’ll choke on your fist down my throat.
Tell me you don’t love me, just one more time,
And I’ll fall away at every word you’ve never said.